Scheduling Nothing Time

What I have discovered about being a homeowner is that nowadays I need to schedule time to do nothing...because there is always something that could be done.

My list right now includes:

• Planting some flowers in the front flower bed
• Washing the windows upstairs
• Making some valences for the office
• Mopping the kitchen floor
• Painting the back hall and door
• Finding/making some kind of eucalyptus wreath for the front door

When we rented, it used to be that I could overlook most of these things for YEARS - for example washing the windows and painting the hall. In the nine years of renting I think I washed 4 of the windows in the condo twice. Now that we own I am on my second round in 8 months.

Now that I own a place there are a few things that I have noticed:

I give more thought to grass than ever before. Does the lawn need to be mowed? Is the patch in the front growing now that I put down the seed? Do I need to water the patch AGAIN?  I also noticed every one else's lawn.

Roofs are another thing I catch myself thinking about on walks with Marley."Man their roof looks like it needs to be replaced?"; I wonder how long until we need to replace our roof.

Mostly the change is that I CARE what others think about my home now. It's no longer, "Oh we're just renting this place." Somehow now that the home is ours it has somehow become a more meaningful extension of me. It might be my mother's voice in me but I want people to think I can keep a "good" home, whatever the hell that means. The biggest compliment on our home that I have received is from my dad who said that he likes coming to our home because it feels, "comfortable".

None of it is obsessive for me (although it may sound like it). None of it is anything that I can't be drawn away from by an enticing social offer (which could mean something as little as taking the dog for a walk), but it means that whenever I sit down to do nothing, watch TV, type this post, I see things that could be getting done.

I usually just remind myself that I am planning to be here for a very long time and that it will all get done in time.

Flash 55 - Contentment

every friday, compose a short story of 55 words - no more, no less. if you want to join in the fun and games and give it a try...post your story and report to the boss G-Man!

This is my first attempt so please be kind. I think that it is too literal.

yellow dog lies peacefully
snoring at my feet
sunshine brightly shines
out the window near
work becomes rhythmic
like the patterns of my heart
with a comfort once forgotten

a contentment once elusive
blankets me in this moment
without expectation or reason
what once was lost
now feels like home

simply being is my peace

Friday Fill-Ins

Friday Fill-Ins thanks to Janet

And...here we go!

1. If we had no winter I could throw away all of the winter coats and that would be just fine with me!

2. The blossoming tulip a perpetual astonishment.

3. If I had my life to live over I would NOT ever use a credit card.

4. There never seems to be enough time inside of four and twenty hours.

5. If you've never been thrilled - you better get moving! Life is too short!

6. To be interested in the changing seasons we need to slow down

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to maybe having dinner with my parents, watching a movie and not do too much else, tomorrow my plans include washing a few more windows in my house and Sunday, I want to make sure I make some time to do nothing but sit and read!

This Is My Simple Pleasure Today

Zebra Jimny Gel Pens
I borrowed one from an office mate about 2 weeks ago and I am in love! Then I had to borrow a second one because I wanted one for home and one for work. Then I decided I should get my own.

zebra jimny gel pens

Thing Really ARE More Expensive; I Can't Be Halluciniating It

Is it me or is everything really getting more expensive? It is not just that things seem to be more expensive they really are. I have been really trying not to spend what I don't have on hand in cash but each pay cycle it seems that there are some needs, not wants, but needs that I just can't cover. Gas in the car, co-pays for prescriptions etc. Hands down we get the mortgage and all of our bills covered every month (thank god for that).  We aren't missing credit card payments and sometimes we can even eek out a little more to pay a bit more than the minimum.

But still there seems to the be handful of charges that we cannot help making. This is OK once in awhile and I wouldn't even be batting an eye at it if we didn't have such a hefty credit card/loan balance as it is. This is something I dispise about myself - having this debt. We ha it paid all off at one poing and then it crept its way back up there when we bought the house. I am not talking about the mortgage payment or student loans.

I know that come May of 2011 - yes 2 years from now - that one of our bigger loans will be paid off giving us an extra $400 a month. This will be hugely helpful in paying down the remainder of our debt but I am more than a little panickyat the thought of carrying the debt we have for two years. Right now I am just trying to take it one day, and one pay cycle at a time. I know everyone is feeling the tight economy, lack of salary increases but yet still getting charged more out of my check for health insurance. The big dinger for me this year is not getting a bonus. I certainly do not get a bonus like the CEOs at AIG or the other big companies (I laugh at the thought of that) but the bonus I do get has historically been considered part of my salary - this year with the loss of that and the looming bill for my classes that start in the fall I am just saving every penny I can.

I amnot trying to sound like I am complaining - everyone I know is having to adjust accordingly to the new state of our economy. I think it is just hard for everyone.

Mother's Day 2009

Today was great. Really. It was absolutley gorgeous out all day even with the crazy wind that was going on. The sun was bright all day and everything just look incredibly spring-like. My brother, A and I hosted a brunch of quiche, fresh fruit, crossiants and lemon wafer cookies with chocolate that was delicious if I do say so myself. We also had an out of this world lemon cake and mango ice cream to celebrate my sister-in-laws birthday which is tomorrow.

mom, me, my brother, dad The only time I got teary-eyed and sad for a moment was when my sister-in-law asked me how I was doing. She knows that I have been having an emotional time over my first Mother's Day knowing I can't have a baby. The way she asked - the fact that she remembered to ask - was incredibly sweet and really touched me. I love having her a sister-in-law and in fact we friends just as much as we are family.

Alexa looked outstanding in her Mother's Day party dress. We got some fantastic photos which will be posted on flickr soon.

After brunch we did some stuff in the yard - moved our grass for the first time - whoo-hoo. The yard looks great and I am thrilled at the azelas that are much healthier and prettier than I thought they might be.

All in all a great day to top a great weekend. If you remember send some positive vibes to Janet if you can this week...

My Best Girl

marley - from the pring 2009 series!

Springtime in a yard

One of the things I am constantly learning from my neice is to observe the little things. They really are amazing. I love this series of photos because it not only shows her looking at everything but it also shows the mimicing of behavior that no one has ever tried to teach her. We are not quite sure where she has picked up the style of walking around with her hands behind her back - possibly from her daycare teacher - but it is an adorable characteristic.

One of the 1,000,001 adorable things that she does.

The Allure of Being Vague

This week has been insane. I have wanted to be more reflective in my writing here but this week it has been all about keeping my head above water and awake. For some reason I have been ridiculously tired this week. Given that I have been so busy at work I haven't had much that I can reflect about or time to think about being tired. Sometimes you just have to plow through.

Yesterday I got some tough news from a good friend. Just when life seems to be humming on auto pilot something comes along and shakes it up just to remind us that we better not take anything for granted.

I know it will all work out because this friend is smart, and beautiful and strong and fiesty and she is going to kick the ass out of this situation. I know that that soon we will be members of the same "club" - all I can hope is that she gets a tattoo to match mine *wink* yes I am totally being vague on purpose!

So tomorrow's Friday and other than hosting Mother's Day brunch on Sunday I am trying really hard to have to no plans at all.